The Elf

Well guys, I’m about to become that mom.  You know, the mom who said she would never do something and then does it.  The one who insisted there would never be an Elf on the Shelf in our house, and yet our Elf is set to arrive on or about December 6.  I know it should have been here by December 1, as per the rules of the Elf on the Shelf club, but I am late to the party and can’t believe I actually am joining this party after all.

I explained to Charlotte last night that an Elf from the North Pole would be coming to our house to keep an eye on her.  I asked what she wanted to name him and she said his name is Baci.  I like that name because I like Baci chocolate, so at least we didn’t fight over that.  I told her she isn’t allowed to touch the Elf and that he is Santa’s representative to make sure she behaves.  I’m really only using this Elf as a disciplinarian, which is probably not the way it’s supposed to be used, but I’m not one to play by the rules.  I know I’m supposed to make the Elf move around and do fun stuff, like poop out marshmallows or get frozen by Elsa in a block of ice or something absolutely ridiculous and time consuming.  I am not going to do these things. (No judgments if you are an Elf on the Shelf fun master, I am just not built this way.)  Baci is basically just going to be the police.  Sure, I’ll move him from one section of the room to the other so she thinks he’s real (she is not going to think he is real) and perhaps I’ll make him sit with her toys or something.  But Baci is basically just going to be Santa’s Gestapo.  Every time this kid acts up I’m going to tell her Baci is watching her and telling Santa.

FEAR IS THE MAGIC OF CHRISTMAS.

In all seriousness, am I supposed to keep the Elf out during the day?  Does he have to hide after she sees him in the morning?  Why did I roll over for this madness? WHY AM I LIKE THIS?