Eric and I took Charlotte to see PJ Masks Live on Saturday night. We figured it would be the best time ever because of how obsessed she is with the show and how our house is covered in PJ Masks toys. You know what else we could have done on Saturday night? We could have put a pile of money on the floor, took a shit on it and then lit it on fire. 

Charlotte wasn’t even really the problem. I mean sure, she asked to go home even before it started and then at one point was watching PJ Masks on the phone at PJ Masks Live, but it was really the show that was trash. For some reason I didn’t think it would be adult actors putting on a performance so that really threw me for a loop. But what really irked me is that they didn’t even bother to sing all of the damn songs on the PJ Masks album and instead sang new bullshit songs. Why the F did I learn all the words to Hey Hey Owlette? Honestly it was a disaster. We left before it was even over because we are so those parents that give up too early, but we beat the crowds and I got a great photo of Charlotte falling backwards into merchandise, so that’s a win in my book. 

There was one point of the night that really got to me though. It’s when they sang the theme song, and Eric and I are singing along and then we listened and looked around at all the other parents belting out the words and I thought to myself: holy shit, how times have changed. This is my life now. Singing “Connor becomes, catboy!!!” with a bunch of other adults. I started laughing so hard that I was tearing up, and then Charlotte was clapping and I cried watching that and it was all very confusing for me to be honest. 

As we drove home we passed by so many bars and restaurants filled with patrons and I can honestly say it. I was fucking jealous. I just spent too much money and too much time watching a bullshit production when I could be having wine on Park Avenue. But then when we got home, Charlotte said “oh mommy, I love you so much!” and my hurt swelled from pure happiness and I thought to myself, well this is why we do this. We go see bullshit productions of TV shows to make our kids happy. And she was happy for the most part. It’s not her fault it was a trash show. 

Hey hey Owelette, amazing Owlette… 

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