by Tuesday night I had a big night. My boss had a big party thrown in her honor, followed by drinks at this lovely bar overlooking Central Park. At least I think it was Central Park. I honestly don’t even remember the name, all I remember is that it was in a mall of some sorts and I don’t know if I could find my way back there if you paid me too. There were MANY drinks had. MANY. I arrived back at home after 1 AM. ONE AM ON A TUESDAY. GOOINNN UPPPP ON A TUESDAY. (Sorry, sorry.) I crawled into bed probably around 1:30 and Charlotte got up for the day at 5:22. If there is a hell, it is 5:22 AM after a big night of drinking with a toddler who demands attention. Oh my GOD I was dying. I had my babysitter coming at 7 to take over for me because I knew I wouldn’t be in any shape to mother her, and thank the lawddd I thought of that. They were the longest minutes of my life. My head was pounding to the drum beats similar to the wail of the opening song to The Lion King. My eyes felt like they were coated with sandpaper. Everything hurt. I think I was still drunk. It was a time.
When the babysitter came I crawled back to bed and passed out for another 4 and a half hours of dead to the world sleep. But the problem with going out drinking now, as opposed to going out drinking back when I was 21, is that bouncing back quickly is near impossible. The entire day was a test of my will to live. I set up a new water table I bought for Charlie and let her play with it and let her pour cold water on my face just to revive me. We watched SO much Disney Junior. Disney Junior all day. So much PJ Masks. So much Doc McStuffins (PJ MASKS WE’RE THE PJ MASKS!! TIMEEEE FOR YOUR CHECK UP TIMEEE FOR YOUR CHECKUP). I ordered lunch and dinner because I couldn’t cook a damn thing. It was a time.
But you know what? It was DAMN WORTH IT. Because for 7 hours (oh my god WHAT WAS I THINKING) I got to drink adult beverages and have a shit ton of fun with coworkers current and old. I laughed SO MUCH. It was the most fun time in America.
However, 3 days have passed and I’m pretty sure I’m still hungover a bit. Getting old sucks.
The Mommy Minutes 
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