A year ago today, almost at this very moment, I found out I was pregnant.  I had a feeling I was pregnant for a few days even though we had just started trying (and by that I mean we had sex literally one time) and I had taken a test a few days earlier but had gotten a negative result, so I went out with coworkers and got very drunk. WHOOPS. June 19, 2014 I woke up for work, took out the tests, peed on one and let it sit on the countertop for the required two minutes. I walked out of the bathroom to get my clothes for work when I heard a buzzing sound. A very loud buzzing sound. I turned on the light in my room and saw a giant flying death beetle zooming around my bedroom ceiling fan.  I did what any normal person would do and shut the bedroom door and laid on the floor. Now, I know I’m known to exaggerate some things but I am NOT exaggerating the size of this fucker. Even Eric will attest to its size because when he came home to kill it he had to break a light bulb in the process!  I wish I still had the text messages I sent to him that morning, full of spelling errors and lots of capitalized letters. How would I get ready for work?  How would I get my iPad?  How in the fuck did I sleep all night with that monster FLYING ABOVE MY FACE?! I still don’t know how it got into my house!  After all of this drama, which included arming myself with a can of hair spray, a towel tied around my head and a military crawl into my room to get the necessary work items, I went back into the bathroom to brush my teeth and put on my makeup. I had completely forgotten about the pregnancy test!  I picked it up and saw that it said “pregnant, 1-2 weeks.”  I sat on the toilet and said holy shit out loud, started laughing uncontrollably, then started crying and debated whether or not to stay home to tell Eric the news or go to work with the biggest secret of my life. I decided to go to work, if only to tell everyone of the bug the size of a rodent in my home, and the entire day went as slow as molasses. I remember Eric even texted me asking if I got my period and I wrote back “WHATEVER IS MEANT TO HAPPEN WILL HAPPEN” and when I got home I shocked the shit out of him too. And then we cleaned the shattered bathroom bulb from the floor. 
And now here we are, one year later. I have an almost 4 month old baby, an imminent 2 weeks and 5 days return to work, a breast pump currently attached to my boobs, and a joy I never thought was possible. What a beautiful life I have. What a beautiful life indeed. 

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