Pampers, I Love You but…

So the diaper choice of the Schwartz household is Pampers for sure.  Charlotte started out wearing the Swaddlers type and then when her explosive ass ruined 475 onesies I realized that the Baby Dry worked better for her tush and my sanity. This is riveting conversation. I can see all the non parents reading this and quickly thanking their lucky stars that they don’t worry about silly things like diaper brands. GOOD FOR YOU NON PARENTS. NOW GO SLEEP 8 HOURS FOR ME.  Anyway, while I love Pampers, their commercials really get to me in more ways than one. For example, have any of you seen the recent commercial?  It’s the one that says “no matter what wakes them at night, a wet diaper shouldn’t be one of them.”  Then there are all these beautiful babies yawning and the words on the screen say they wake up because they miss you and I start to cry because the baby yawning is a newborn and Charlotte is already big and then it’s just a mess of me rocking the baby sobbing WHY ARE YOU GETTING OLD?!  BUT THEN!!! This is when the commercial stops the tears from flowing instantly and just fills me with rage. They show a mother putting a diaper on the baby and she does it so fucking delicately as if she’s icing a damn cake for the Queen of England! Her fingers are all delicate and she slowly fastens the diaper and the baby is still and all is well. HAS ANYONE AT PAMPERS DIAPERED A BABY?!  Even if the child is asleep they are still moving, I swear it!  This is where Pampers makes non parents think “oh yes I can do this!” and then when they become a parent and their daughter is shoving her foot in her own shit every time it’s diaper change time on a daily basis they wonder why they were lied to so terribly. Unless this is just me this happens to?  Please tell me this isn’t just me.